Quotes


This is an actual conversation I had in Google Chat today:

S: pharmacists
me: huh?
S: how do you feel about them being called “doctors”
due to the PharmD?
me: I care about this as much as the Pluto planet controversy
S: awesome
so what’s your opinion?
me: in america you are free to call urself whatever you please
see “Dr” dre
see “president” bush
S: lol
thx
i recycled your joke
and gave you no credit
me: khiyana!
(deep betrayal)

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I did a major web surfing session today and while I was on my way I picked up a bunch of quote I thought were cool. Here they are enjoy:

“If voting changed anything they would make it illegal.”

“Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.” -Ben Franklin

-”I believe there must be one true soul mate for every person.”
-”He must be very busy.”

“For tech support press the exact value of 22 divided by 7.”

“Don’t get all ‘mathy’ on me.”

“From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.”

“Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.”

“She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs”

“If we all did the things we are capable of doing we would astound ourselves.”

“Just out farting around with my camera in China and having some fun.” (farting around?)

“You can fool some of the people all of the time, and those are the ones you want to concentrate on.” — George W. Bush

“Military men are dumb, stupid animals to be used as pawns for foreign policy.” Henry Kissinger, quoted by Bob Woodward in The Final Days, 1976

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Sometime while in class working as a substitute teacher, I have just had enough and so this is how I deal with it. (more…)

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I recently attended a khutbah by Shaykh Waleed Basyouni which was artfully conducted in both Arabic and English. In it he had two quotes, which I paraphrase here. that I thought are worth sharing.

“Being a true faqih [one with true understanding of religion] does not mean knowing the difference between good and evil but knowing the better of two good deeds and the worst of two evil deeds.”

“A man is like a zero. His true value is based on where he places himself, before or after a number.”

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Here is Isaac Asimov on Intelligence. Think about this next time you take an IQ test.

What is intelligence, anyway? When I was in the army, I received the kind of aptitude test that all soldiers took and, against a normal of 100, scored 160. No one at the base had ever seen a figure like that, and for two hours they made a big fuss over me. (It didn’t mean anything. The next day I was still a buck private with KP - kitchen police - as my highest duty.)

All my life I’ve been registering scores like that, so that I have the complacent feeling that I’m highly intelligent, and I expect other people to think so too. Actually, though, don’t such scores simply mean that I am very good at answering the type of academic questions that are considered worthy of answers by people who make up the intelligence tests - people with intellectual bents similar to mine?

For instance, I had an auto-repair man once, who, on these intelligence tests, could not possibly have scored more than 80, by my estimate. I always took it for granted that I was far more intelligent than he was. Yet, when anything went wrong with my car I hastened to him with it, watched him anxiously as he explored its vitals, and listened to his pronouncements as though they were divine oracles - and he always fixed my car.

Well, then, suppose my auto-repair man devised questions for an intelligence test. Or suppose a carpenter did, or a farmer, or, indeed, almost anyone but an academician. By every one of those tests, I’d prove myself a moron, and I’d be a moron, too. In a world where I could not use my academic training and my verbal talents but had to do something intricate or hard, working with my hands, I would do poorly. My intelligence, then, is not absolute but is a function of the society I live in and of the fact that a small subsection of that society has managed to foist itself on the rest as an arbiter of such matters.

Consider my auto-repair man, again. He had a habit of telling me jokes whenever he saw me. One time he raised his head from under the automobile hood to say: “Doc, a deaf-and-mute guy went into a hardware store to ask for some nails. He put two fingers together on the counter and made hammering motions with the other hand. The clerk brought him a hammer. He shook his head and pointed to the two fingers he was hammering. The clerk brought him nails. He picked out the sizes he wanted, and left. Well, doc, the next guy who came in was a blind man. He wanted scissors. How do you suppose he asked for them?”

Indulgently, I lifted by right hand and made scissoring motions with my first two fingers. Whereupon my auto-repair man laughed raucously and said, “Why, you dumb jerk, He used his voice and asked for them.” Then he said smugly, “I’ve been trying that on all my customers today.” “Did you catch many?” I asked. “Quite a few,” he said, “but I knew for sure I’d catch you.” “Why is that?” I asked. “Because you’re so goddamned educated, doc, I knew you couldn’t be very smart.”

And I have an uneasy feeling he had something there.

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